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Jun. 15th, 2011 05:01 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
cordialenvy[Filter: Private]
At least ... at the very least, it leaves me some time to think.
I imagine Jelena knows. What goes on in this house that she does not immediately know? The woman has no respect for anyone else's privacy. How could she, when it might upset her delecate balance, her schedules, her Routine. Dragons forbid any of us should break that. The world would never be the same.
At least she does not ask about it. At least she only gives me looks, Pitying. How absolutely predictable. I'm hardly surprised. I oughtn't even be angry, because perhaps I do deserve the pity, even if I don't wish for it.
And Thomas.
Oh, Thomas, love, where do I even begin.
What does he want me to tell him, exactly? It will all be all right, love. Everything will be fine, love. I understand, love. Please, love, don't feel so ashamed. Every time he wishes to talk I know it's going to be the same, fishing those silly meaningless reassurances out of me. How very like him. It is a wonder how any man in Dentoria holds any power, if all of them need the constant soothing that he does.
I oughtn't be angry. This is the greatest life I could wish for. I am wed to a man who treasures me above anything else. I want for nothing. I will be the Lady of Nallen once Lord Horace and Lady Jelena have passed.
What else could I ever wish for. I oughtn't be angry in the least.
At least ... at the very least, it leaves me some time to think.
I imagine Jelena knows. What goes on in this house that she does not immediately know? The woman has no respect for anyone else's privacy. How could she, when it might upset her delecate balance, her schedules, her Routine. Dragons forbid any of us should break that. The world would never be the same.
At least she does not ask about it. At least she only gives me looks, Pitying. How absolutely predictable. I'm hardly surprised. I oughtn't even be angry, because perhaps I do deserve the pity, even if I don't wish for it.
And Thomas.
Oh, Thomas, love, where do I even begin.
What does he want me to tell him, exactly? It will all be all right, love. Everything will be fine, love. I understand, love. Please, love, don't feel so ashamed. Every time he wishes to talk I know it's going to be the same, fishing those silly meaningless reassurances out of me. How very like him. It is a wonder how any man in Dentoria holds any power, if all of them need the constant soothing that he does.
I oughtn't be angry. This is the greatest life I could wish for. I am wed to a man who treasures me above anything else. I want for nothing. I will be the Lady of Nallen once Lord Horace and Lady Jelena have passed.
What else could I ever wish for. I oughtn't be angry in the least.
